This weekend I read a book that got me all tied up in knots. It is an inspirational memoir by a popular author that is my age and single, or she was at the time the book was released. We both graduated high school in 1997. I had a great job right after graduating college. She found her dream job not long after. We both have a desire to be a blessing to single women. We both are bloggers and authors. But it is here that our similarities cease.

Even though our paths are vastly different and our destinations likewise, I chose to focus on her current success compared to my stuckness. It’s a word. Trust me. I quickly became upset and decided to throw a colossal pity party, complete with tears and tissues and a few bemoaning texts to a friend. It wasn’t pretty.

The next morning I dragged my puffy eyes out of bed and began my day with morning pages. Of course the bruises to my heart and ego still felt fresh so this is what I poured onto my three designated pages of brain dumping. I realized quickly how foolish I was being. I realized that I didn’t want her life or her blessings, so why should I be jealous of her success?

Everyone is on a different journey.

Comparing my path to someone else’s path is like comparing the Golden Gate Bridge to a Boeing 757. They both help people get to their final destinations, but they look and operate in completely different ways. Expecting a bridge to look like a plane is foolishness, just like expecting my life to look like anyone else’s life is also foolishness.

Comparison is also a fast way to breed discontent and ungratefulness. I look at my dead ends and detours and feel discouraged because I am comparing them to her successes. I see her starting point and her current location and ignore all she endured in the middle. Loss of career. Bad relationships. Mental breakdown. Physical abuse. She had detours too. Detours I wouldn’t want, just like I am sure she wouldn’t want to travel mine.

Everyone has different goals and rewards.

If I were to hold up my dreams to this author’s vision board, they would look vastly different. Well, aside from both coveting the New York Times Bestseller List, but what author doesn’t want that? When she was mapping out her journey she had planned sight seeing stops like New York City, meeting Oprah, getting married. I want to live in Italy for at least 3-6 months, meet Christine Caine, and adopt a little girl.

If I met Oprah, that wouldn’t be as exciting to me as it was for her. Her blessings are handcrafted to fit her heart’s desires perfectly just like mine are. Spending one second coveting her life is an affront to the Creator who made us both uniquely beautiful.

 Joy is a treasure hunt.

If I spend my time comparing myself to others and looking for their blessings, I will miss those special gifts God has hidden for me all throughout my day. If I am to enjoy my trip, I need to make it a treasure hunt. I need to walk eyes wide open, looking for God’s good hand around every corner.

Even in our dead ends and detours, God has treasures for us to find. Nuggets of wisdom. Jewels of friendship. Difficult experiences can turn into precious memories, just like diamonds in the rough.

Choose today to find the treasures meant only for you. Put the maps and the measuring sticks away. Find your joy.

Have you found yourself on an unexpected detour in life that ended up being a wonderful blessing in disguise? Share your experience in the comments below.

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