I had an interaction with a dear woman several weeks ago that has been on my mind ever since. She experienced abuse as a child at the hand of her father. Abuse that continued in various ways into her adulthood. As a result, she has some understandable doubts about the goodness of God. I won’t share the conversation verbatim. But the heart of her question was how she could trust that God loved her. How could she believe God wants the best for her when her circumstances point to the contrary.
I understand her doubt. I have felt her same desire to believe while hesitating for fear of being hurt again. Maybe you’ve been there too? I gave her several thoughts based on Scripture, but in hindsight, I wish I would have given her a different answer.
The reality is, we all have moments of doubt. We get a bad report from the doctor and we question why God didn’t protect us from this disease. We see the corruption and abuse in the world and wonder why God doesn’t wipe out all the evil. The funds dry up or the job goes away and become bitter because God hasn’t provided. A loved one dies and we can’t understand why God didn’t answer our prayers for healing.
Faith, and trust in the goodness of God especially, boils down to one thing. Choice. God has given us a multitude of reasons to trust Him. The ultimate proof of His love is Jesus Himself. Jesus chose to enter our world and sacrifice Himself to pay for our sin and unite us with the Father. If that were the only thing He ever did, it would be more than enough. But He didn’t stop there. He meets our needs, answers our prayers, speaks to us through His Word, performs miracles, and so much more.
Over and over again, God has shown us that He loves us and He is worthy of our trust. Yet so often, we point to our current trial or hold up our wounded hearts as proof God doesn’t love us and we can’t trust Him. We choose to believe a lie.
This pattern hasn’t changed since the Garden of Eden. God pours out His love and attention on His children and invites them to trust Him by obeying His commands. Satan twists the healthy boundary God established for our good. He makes us believe God is withholding something from us in malice. We ignore the proof of God’s goodness and believe the lie of Satan. We then use the negative consequences of our actions as further proof God is against us.
The truth is, God always gives us a choice. Always. He allows us to choose whether we believe He exists or not. We choose to believe He is good or not. Believe He is for us or against us. Believe His actions are for our ultimate good or destruction. God never chooses for us. He allows us to go our own way and learn from the natural consequences of our actions. God gives us the ability to choose because He wants a relationship with us. He created humans with minds, desires, and personalities because He delights in us. If He wanted to He could have created a planet of reproducible robots who always did what He wanted. But then that wouldn’t be love—that would be control.
So how can we trust God in the midst of hard times? How can we believe He loves us when He feels so far away? We choose to trust. We choose to believe that He is good and kind and loving. We choose to act on these truths even if our eyes tell us something different.
Think about Peter walking on water. The story is in Matthew 14 if you’d like to read it. Peter chose to get out of that boat and God granted him the ability to do the impossible. Why? Because Peter chose to believe Jesus when He said “Come.” The circumstances screamed danger. The laws of nature said it couldn’t be done. But God is bigger than storms and gravity. And as long as Peter kept His eyes on Jesus, he stayed above the waves. A flesh and blood human walked on the Sea of Galilee because of a choice to believe the Son of God.
I wonder how many times I could have done impossible things in Holy Spirit power? How many miracles have I failed to see or do because I believed a lie? How many blessings have I lost because I tried to operate in my own strength? How many answers to prayer have I ignored because the answer didn’t fit within what I thought was best?
What might change if I make a different choice in the future? What might change for you? Imagine what could happen if you decided God is good. That He is for you, and He is working all things together for your good and His glory. What bad habits could you break? What dreams could come true? Whose lives might change for the better?
Scripture tells us that Jesus did not do many miracles in His hometown because of their lack of faith. (Matthew 13:58) How many miracles is He not doing in your life and my life because of our unbelief?
I don’t know about you, but I’m growing weary of doing things on my own. I have reached the end of my rope. The things I want to see happen in my life depend on God doing the impossible. Which means I have to set aside my “try hard” habits and surrender to His will and way for me. I have to say, “God, I can’t but you can. Tell me to come to you on the water.” And then I have to get out of the boat.
What about you? Are you tired of trying to hang on in the storm and hoping you don’t drown? Do you want to see God hold you up on top of the waves?
I know we all wish we wouldn’t have any storms. That everything would be peaceful and beautiful all the time. A 24/7 tropical vacation minus hurricanes and bugs. Unfortunately, we live on a broken planet. Jesus even said, “In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” (John 16:33)
There will be hard times. We will face rough waters. But we can choose to walk with Jesus in the storm if we want to. We can choose to believe He will be with us every step of the way despite what the wind and waves tell us. And when we choose to believe, we show everyone around us how powerful and kind our Jesus is. We become living proof of God’s goodness and faithfulness. We become the lights of the world Jesus saved us to be. And what is more beautiful than a sea of stars shining brightly in the night sky?
The Day of the Lord is coming my friend. Jesus’ return is near. I can’t wait to see His beautiful face and hug His neck. Until then, I have to choose to step into the calling He’s placed on my life and be a light in the darkness. Will you join me?
There is something special about sitting down with your Bible, a pretty colored pen, and a sheet of paper to see what happens. It feels like treasure hunting. And the nuggets I’ve found while studying 1 Peter chapter 1 is akin to striking gold.
In the first half of the chapter, Peter celebrates the work of God, begun before the foundation of the world, to purchase His children out of bondage with the precious blood of Jesus and to give them (us) an eternal inheritance at the end of days. His language is exuberant, his tone congratulatory.
In the second half of the chapter, he directs his readers into the proper response after receiving the precious gift of salvation and in the waiting of the full realization of our salvation in the life to come. He refreshes commands from the Old Testament to be holy as God is holy and to love others with a pure heart. But the one thing that struck me the most as I studied settled in my heart as a question.
Where is your hope?
Peter doesn’t explicitly ask this of his readers, but hope is woven throughout the whole chapter. In verse 3 he speaks of “living hope” rooted in the resurrection of Jesus, and then in verse 13 he commands them to “set your hope” on the graces waiting for them after the second coming of Jesus.
The fact that Peter commands them where to place their hope implies a possibility to set their hope on things other than Jesus. He seems to offer three possibilities for the focused attention of their/our hearts: 1) the “passions of your former ignorance” in verse 14, 2) the current trials of life in verses 6-7 and implied in verse 24, or 3) the outcome of our faith rooted in the imperishable Word of God in verses 9 and 25.
I feel as if Peter is taking on the role of Big Brother, putting his arm around our shoulders and saying, “Listen, if you focus on your past you’ll get stuck in guilt and shame and trapped in bad habits. If you focus on the current trials and persecutions, you’ll be discouraged and afraid. But, if you focus on the wonderful riches of your salvation both now and in the days to come, you can have hope and joy that defies understanding.”
I looked up the meaning of the word “hope” in the Greek these readers would have read his letter in. It means: “to wait for salvation with joy and full confidence.” (https://www.blueletterbible.org/lexicon/g1679/kjv/tr/0-1/) I don’t know about you, but when I am going through difficult times, I often feel frustrated, afraid, and worried that the future is going to bring more harm than good. My focus is inward, on how I’m going to escape from this trial so life can feel easy again. I don’t have have confidence that God is going to come through for me in the ways I’d like. That’s not the kind of waiting Peter wants us to engage in. He wants us to “set our hope” or in the words of Paul, “Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth.” (Colossians 3:2)
If you find yourself turning to old habits for comfort or bemoaning your current circumstances, I would join Peter in encouraging you to “set your hope” on the eternal Word of God which promises a glorious inheritance waiting for you in Heaven. I know for me, this is harder than it sounds. But it is always worth it when I take the time to refocus my mind away from self and onto Jesus. I find my spirit lifted, my hope restored, and my smile returned to my face. I believe the same will happen for you.
This world is full of brokenness and broken people. You can find heartache anywhere you look. But if you keep your eyes on Jesus and your thoughts filled with gratitude for all you have in Him, you can endure any trial with joy and hope and peace. And in so doing, you will be a testimony of God’s grace to those around you. May it be so Lord Jesus.
Autumn is a season of glorious transition. Bright days turn moody, golden light filters through red and orange leaves. Mornings are crisp. Apples are sweet. Bright blue sky hides behind mounds of gray clouds, astonishing us every time we catch a glimpse of its brilliance.
As the world shifts from summer to winter, I find myself contemplating transitions of a hidden nature. And as is God’s way, He’s been guiding my thoughts as I read through Deuteronomy and the book of Joshua.
At the end of his life, after reciting the highlights of the previous 40 years of wilderness wanderings, miracles, battles, failures, and successes of a newly born nation, Moses officiates a transition of leadership from himself to his assistant, Joshua. The Israelites were facing many unknowns. A new land, a new leader, a new way of life.
Moses had this to say to the people…
“Be strong and courageous. Do not fear or be in dread of them, for it is the Lord your God who goes with you. He will not leave you or forsake you.” (Deuteronomy 31:6)
And to Joshua, Moses said…
“Be strong and courageous, for you shall go with this people in to the land that the Lord has sworn to their fathers to give them, and you shall put them in possession of it. It is the Lord who goes before you. He will be with you; he will not leave you or forsake you. Do not fear or be dismayed.” (Deuteronomy 31:7-8)
The path before them was uncertain. But the God who was with them had been faithful to His promises. He had delivered them from Egypt. He had destroyed any enemy they faced in the wilderness. He had provided meat, and bread, and water. He had kept their sandals from wearing out and guided them through seas on dry land. He had kept them safe and close for 40 years and He promised to do it again, provided Israel stayed close to Him.
The part of this transition that I find most incredible is that God tells the people the end of their story. Right at the beginning, before they even cross the Jordan, God lays out their future. They would win their battles and establish their cities, but in the comfort of their permanence, they would wander once again. Their hearts would be drawn away from God to the gods of their enemies and this devotion to imagination would destroy them.
Yet God still kept His promise and gave them their inheritance.
Like the Father of the prodigal son in Jesus’ parable, God the Father gave His children an abundance of blessing. God was extravagant in His good gifts. All He desired was for His children to stay in relationship with Him. This is all He still wants today.
The transitions of life, as nerve-racking as they may be, reveal where our loyalties lie. The things we fear show us the chinks in our faith. When I worry about finances, I’m really worried that God won’t provide for my needs. When I worry about where I will live, I’m failing to trust God to guide me. When I worry about difficult choices or suffering I may endure, I’m choosing to believe God does not want good for my life and that His will is not what is best for me.
In all of my fear-filled prayers I feel God impressing on my heart over and over again the same words He gave to Joshua.
“Be strong and courageous…I go before you. I will be with you. I will not leave you or forsake you. Don’t be afraid or dismayed.”
God isn’t giving me a map, He’s giving me His hand. He’s asking me to trust Him, stay close to Him, follow Him, walk with Him. He’s promised to meet my needs and fight my battles as long as I keep my eyes on Him.
I don’t know what transition you may be going through or what battles you’re facing, but I know the God of Moses and Joshua is the same God today who loves, protects, and provides for His children. All He asks is for us to lay aside the distractions of gold and stone and cling to Him.
For me, that means setting aside my desire for security and a timeline to trust that His mercies are new every morning and sufficient to get me through whatever I may face each day. That’s easier said than done. But each time I stop clinging to some semblance of a plan and grasp the hem of His robe, I feel the panic retreat and the peace wash over my heart.
All my fighting for control is nothing more than me acting like a toddler squirming out of the big, safe hug God’s trying to give me. Learning to lean into His chest is difficult. I’d rather take comfort in having all the answers. But the answers are a cold idolatrous illusion of safety and His arms are the real haven of rest. If transitions are what keep me close, then I welcome them with the little belief I have and pray God’s mercy and love will lift from my shoulders the heaps of unbelief I carry. I pray the same for you today.
Trauma has a way of distorting perceptions. Instead of trusting that others have good intentions and desire to bless you, you become suspicious and believe people are out to get you. When good things happen, you find yourself tensing up, waiting for the “shoe to drop” or the “tables to turn.” When someone expresses love, you wonder what their angle is, afraid of being taken advantage of or hurt.
Sometimes this is hard to see in yourself, but Scripture gives us examples to help us learn. In the first chapter of Deuteronomy, Moses reminds this new generation of all they and their parents had been through during the 40 years since they left the back-breaking slavery of Egypt. He shares how the people asked for spies to scope out the land before entering it and how they returned with proof of “the good land that the Lord our God is giving us.” You would think the people would have been thrilled. But as is often the case when you’ve experienced trauma, the people focused on the obstacles and the giants in the land. They said,
“Because the Lord hated us he has brought us out of the land of Egypt, to give us into the hands of the Amorites, to destroy us.”
Deuteronomy 1:27
Was their thinking true? Did God hate them? No!
Moses responded,
“Do not be in dread or afraid of them. The Lord your God who goes before you will himself fight for you just as he did for you in Egypt before your eyes, and in the wilderness, where you have seen how the Lord your God carried you, as a man carries his son, all the way that you went until you came to this place.”
Deuteronomy 1:29-31
The Lord brought the Israelites out of Egypt because he loved them and wanted good things for them. He protected them from Pharaoh’s army and provided food and water for them. He led them with a pillar of cloud and fire through the wilderness. He prepared a beautiful country for them to inhabit. He was like a parent on Christmas morning, eager for His children to open all their specially chosen gifts.
God is the same way with you, but it may be difficult for you to see Him with such clarity. It may seem like God is out to get you, that He’s mad at you, or simply putting up with you because Jesus died for you so He has to love you. Those are all common responses of someone who has been through trauma and has, in some measure, transferred the blame for the bad things that a person did onto God.
“What comes into our minds when we think about God is the most important thing about us.”
A.W. Tozer
If you believe God hates you, you’re going to have a hard time loving Him and you’ll probably do everything you can to avoid Him. What you believe about God will directly impact every aspect of your life. The good news is…
You can change your habits of thinking!
On those days when I feel like I am all alone and the weight of the world is on my shoulders, I use a tool psychologists call “reframing” and Jesus people call “preaching truth to yourself.” I first heard about this technique in a wonderful sermon titled, “The Troubled Soul, by C.J. Mahaney. You can listen to it by following this link to YouTube. I find it most helpful when I practice reframing with pen and paper, but you don’t have to use anything if you don’t want to.
How to Practice Reframing
State the Problem
Reframing is simple. You acknowledge what you are thinking and feeling in an honest and non-judgmental way. You don’t beat yourself up, you simply state the problem.
“I am so discouraged. I feel like God isn’t listening to my prayers and I’m going to be stuck in this terrible situation forever.”
Speak Truth
After admitting how you feel, remind yourself that feelings come and go, but God’s truth is a solid rock you can stand on no matter what storm is swirling around you. Take apart the problem piece by piece and remind yourself what is actually true.
“I know that discouragement is a tool of Satan to get my eyes off God and on myself. God always listens to my prayers and answers them in a way that is for my good and His glory. He is for me and He is always working on my behalf. It’s okay to feel sad or upset because God understands I am human. But I will feel better if I surrender this situation to God and trust Him to bring good out of this problem in His time and in His way.”
Apply Scripture
To take the exercise even further, write out Scripture that applies to your situation and any application you can make to your thoughts and feelings.
“Deuteronomy 1:29-31 reminds me that I don’t have to be afraid or feel alone. God is always with me and He is fighting on my behalf. He will carry me through this situation and provide the best solution for me because He is a good Father and He loves me more than I can even imagine. I can trust Him to lead me through this wilderness into a good land He has chosen for me.”
The next time you believe God hates you or even might not really like you all that much, try this reframing exercise and see what happens. If you’re a journal keeper, you may want to record all of this in your journal and follow up with a second entry when God reveals how He has been working in your life.
Let me know what you think about reframing! I’d love to hear from you.
Sometime late in 2021, a phrase from 1 John 4:18 started running through my thoughts. “Perfect love casts out fear.” I’ve been wondering on that phrase and studying around it trying to figure out the mechanics of the thing. I have a lot of fear and I would love to be rid of it. It’s plagued me all of my life, and frankly, I’m tired of it. I want to be free and courageous and ready for anything God has for me.
The context around the phrase sheds some light.
Whoever confesses that Jesus is the Son of God, God abides in him, and he in God. So we have come to know and to believe the love that God has for us. God is love, and whoever abides in love abides in God, and God abides in him. By this is love perfected with us, so that we may have confidence for the day of judgment, because as he is so also are we in this world. There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear. For fear has to do with punishment, and whoever fears has not been perfected in love.
– 1 John 4:15-18
Perfect love is God’s love—and when we enter into relationship with Him through Jesus, the love of God is given to us through the work of the Holy Spirit. This confirmation of salvation takes away any fear of judgment we may have regarding the end times or the end of our days when we meet God face to face. The payment for our sin has been paid in full so we have nothing to fear. Jesus took our punishment for us on the cross.
But how does this help us not be afraid in other areas of life?
The answer came to me recently through an unexpected source. I was reading the book, “The Power of Showing Up: How parental presence shapes who our kids become and how their brains get wired” by Daniel J. Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson. The book is a simple yet detailed explanation of Attachment Science—how children, beginning at birth, form secure or insecure bonds with their primary caregivers based on whether or not they believe the caregiver can be trusted to meet their physical, emotional, and relational needs.
Children who have parents that attend to them when they cry, feed them when their hungry, make eye contact, play, cuddle, and do various other things on a consistent basis that communicate their love and commitment to caring for them form a strong attachment to that parent which also frames their view of the world.
Children who don’t receive consistent attentive care come to believe that the world is a scary place and they are on their own to meet their own needs.
Furthermore, children who are told to ignore their feelings (when parents say, “Don’t cry. You’re not hurt. They aren’t scary—go give them a hug.” etc.) learn they cannot even trust themselves and the messages their body is giving them.
These same children grow into adults who struggle with fear and have difficulty forming trusting relationships with themselves and others. This impacts every aspect of their lives, including their view of and relationship with God. But, as the authors state in The Power of Showing Up,
“History is not destiny!”
Science has shown us that children with insecure attachment can develop secure attachment with a change in parental behavior. Similarly, adults can learn to overcome the insecure attachment of their childhood by examining and understanding their past and then making changes towards secure and healthy relationships in their present.
“The acceptance and forgiveness that arise with making sense of your life are profoundly liberating. In many ways, we come to forgive ourselves for the adaptations we had to make, and to accept not only who we’ve been, but who we are now inviting ourselves to become…By doing your own personal inner work and earning a secure attachment, you break the cycle of insecure attachment and improve the lives of generations who follow you.”
The Power of Showing Up, p. 72
What hopeful words!
The most beautiful and profound lesson I have learned in this study of attachment is that just one healthy adult in a child’s life can make a profound difference for their attachment and development. And as adults, one healthy relationship can help a person heal from past developmental trauma.
We were made to help each other heal!
Beyond the human plane, we can also find healing when the one healthy relationship we enter into is with Jesus. We often struggle with our relationship with God, Jesus, and Holy Spirit because we attribute to the Trinity the attributes of our parents. We may feel God is cold and distant, angry, or unable to meet our needs in some way.
But if we can realize that any belief about God that is negative is also untrue, we can begin to accept His perfect love toward us. His perfect love can heal our brains and restore to us a sense of peace and belonging we may never have experienced with a human being. God is the perfect parent who is always there to help us through, even when trouble comes. God will never leave us or forsake us. (Hebrews 13:5) Furthermore,
“Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.”
– Romans 8:38-39
If we can learn to open our hearts to God’s healing, He will make us new. He will heal our broken places, filling the cracks with hope and courage and new life.
The fear that has been my constant companion for years may always be a struggle to some degree, but it doesn’t have to be the defining feature of my life. Leaning into God’s love and power and truth can make a way for me when I haven’t been able to see a way forward in the past.
I believe He can do the same for you.
I’m praying that this year LOVE takes the wheel in our lives and leaves fear on the side of the road. Will you join me? Let’s be road trip buddies into the freedom of God’s love and purpose for our lives.
Hide and seek is a game we learn as tiny children. Even before we become mobile enough to run behind a chair, we cover our eyes and think that this makes us invisible to those around us. We hide until “peek-a-boo” gives us sight once more and we giggle in delight of being seen and loved.
As we grow, we believe we are too mature for such childish games, and yet, we find ourselves hiding all the same. We hide from people we believe might disapprove of us, presenting only the most polished versions of ourselves. And we hide from God, covering our eyes, shielding our faces from His gaze, certain that if we look to Him we will see disapproval and judgment in His eyes. We hide out of fear that the love we so desperately want will be withheld from us. So rather than find our fears to be true, we run from that pain and cling to lesser loves in the hopes they will satisfy the deep desires of our hearts.
We see this pattern as early as the garden of Eden where God once roamed in the cool of the day side by side with Adam and Eve. Can you imagine their conversations? The loving glances, the laughter rippling through the flower-laden paradise. God delighted in them as dearly loved children.
Then one day, everything changed. Eve decided to listen to another voice besides her Creator Friend. She believed a lie that there was more for her beyond what God gave. She grasped for satisfaction in things and ideas that were not meant for her to explore. Things God had cautioned her against for her own safety and happiness.
That night, when Eve heard God’s voice calling for her, she didn’t run to Him in joy as she had done every day before. She hid. She turned her face away, believing He would no longer love her as He once had. She was wrong about many things that day, but above all, she was wrong about the motives she ascribed to God.
A missionary friend shared with me an understanding of God many people in Africa adhere to as they have for centuries. They believe that a supreme being once was so near to man that if you reached out to him you could touch him. And then one day a woman preparing a meal reached over her head with a pestle and hit the supreme being, making him angry and causing him to withdraw from humanity. Now, in order to communicate with god, they must go through ancestors or lesser gods and goddesses.
It stuck me how this mythology resembles the early chapters of Genesis, but from a human perspective. The pattern continues today. I disobey God, or injure Him if you will. I feel shame and believe that God must want nothing more to do with me so I hide to protect myself and only approach Him through an intermediary like doing good things to earn His approval. But this isn’t the nature of God at all according to Scripture.
“But the Lord God called to the man and said to him, “Where are you?”And he said, “I heard the sound of you in the garden, and I was afraid, because I was naked, and I hid myself.” He said, “Who told you that you were naked?”
Genesis 3:9-11
Genesis shows us a God who knew Adam and Eve had sinned and drew near to them anyway. He called to them, drawing them with kindness, coaxing them to confess. When they admitted their shame, He didn’t condemn them. He asked them who had influenced their thinking. This desire to hide hadn’t come from anything He had said. It had come from the one who seeks to kill, steal, and destroy. The Enemy of truth and love.
The rules were never meant to earn the favor of God. Adam and Eve had favor already. The rules were meant to protect them from a harm—a lesser life than God’s perfect best for them. Moses tried to explain the same thing to the Israelite people centuries later.
“See, I have taught you statutes and rules, as the Lord my God commanded me, that you should do them in the land that you are entering to take possession of it. Keep them and do them, for that will be your wisdom and your understanding in the sight of the peoples, who, when they hear all these statutes, will say, ‘Surely this great nation is a wise and understanding people.’ For what great nation is there that has a god so near to it as the Lord our God is to us, whenever we call upon him? And what great nation is there, that has statutes and rules so righteous as all this law that I set before you today?”
Deuteronomy 4:5-8
By living a holy and pure life that looks drastically different from the culture we live in, we draw people’s attention to God. The commandments weren’t given to restrict, but to lead Israel and all those they encountered into freedom and abundance.
Several weeks ago I listened as a woman shared her reaction to the idea of God looking at her. She turned her face away and held up her hand as if to shield herself from attack. The idea she has of God being angry and disapproving of her is one planted in her mind from the father of lies, not the Lover of her soul. If she gathered the courage to withdraw her hand and truly look at the Father without the mental walls she hides behind, she would be overcome with the love she sees in His eyes. God loves her so much that His own son died so they would have nothing between them ever again. But in her fear of being naked and exposed before God, she quickly covers herself with leaves and keeps her eyes fixed on the ground at her feet. My heart breaks for the love she’s missing out on and the peace that comes from seeing God smiling in adoration as you toddle toward Him with faltering, imperfect steps.
God understands the brokenness of the planet we inhabit and the damage sin has done to our hearts—sin that we have chosen and sin we have been the victims of by the hands of others. We are a battered and bruised people, but our God is the Great Physician. He is the balm for our weary souls. When we hide from Him our wounds go untended.
If you can, gather the courage to sit in silence for a few moments and ask God to show you what He really thinks of you. I did this several years ago full of fear that I would see the glaring disappointment and rejection I had come to believe was my lot in life. In my mind, I knew all the theology of love, but the Enemy had used painful circumstances to convince me I was a failure who could never be good enough or worthy enough to be fully loved by God. He might put up with me because of Jesus, but there would always be a mountain of improvements I’d need to make to get on His good side. I was wrong.
When I prayed, eyes closed and face lifted to the winter sun, all I could think of was a warm and twinkling smile. It was as if God whispered in my spirit that He not only loved me more than I could imagine, but that He really liked me too. In fact, He delighted in me and loved that I had come to Him to spend those quiet moments with Him. It made me cry.
My tattered heart began to heal that day. Slowly and gently God has continued to root out my faulty beliefs about His nature and replace them with the truth of His loving kindness toward me and the friendship He desires to have with me just as He had with Adam and Eve before sin and death arrived. I still struggle—some days more than others. But when I do, I’m able to go to Him and ask Him to show me what is true. I’m never disappointed.
Friend, I know it’s hard and scary to ask God to show you the truth. You may have heard from parents or spiritual leaders or friends all the ways that you fall short in their eyes, but God is different. When Jesus died, He painted over that list of wrongs with His blood. Submitting yourself to Him washes your heart as clean and bright as a summer sky after the rain. When God looks at you, He sees His daughter, glowing with the radiance made possible on the cross. You may have a hard time seeing it in the mirror, but if you ask God to show you, I promise He will.
May you have the courage to lift your head and look into the eyes of the God who loves you and is near to you today and always.
