Pirates of the Carribean: Curse of the Black Pearl is one of my all-time favorite movies, for several reasons.
- It’s the best packing/cleaning movie of all time because of…
- The music.
- But then there’s…
- The scenery,
- The sarcasm,
- THE Johnny Depp,
- And last but not least…
- The credits.
Pirates was one of the first movies to reward those who watch to the very end with an enchore performance by Jack…the monkey. But beyond this clever filming jewel, I love the credits because they acknowledge every person that assisted in the making of the movie, including the people who served the snacks on set. And you should see the list of accountants!
Great works of art or influence rarely happen in isolation. Click To Tweet I say “rarely” because I’ve been taught to never say never. Even the lone writer, hidden away in a cabin has the benefit of teachers, family members, other authors, and more that make his work possible.
However, there are times when people feel alone in their passion or their position. This can manifest in two different mindsets: the “Go It Alone” and “I’m All Alone” attitudes. Regardless of whether you are blazing a trail of independence or throwing a party of the pity variety, the destructive aftermath looks the same.
Pride
No one likes an arrogant jerk, but those who keep the limelight to themselves are just that. You may have worked hard and sacrificed much to get where you are, but you didn’t do it alone. Your circle of influence will sense your martyr syndrome and be hurt by it. Take time to reflect on those that have poured into you and thank them for helping make your successes possible.
If you find yourself chewing on a helping of “woe is me,” the same advice applies. Have you been pushing people away with your attitude? Do you feel like God gave your calling to you and that makes you 100% responsible for seeing it through? Have you pushed aside offers of help because no one can do it like you can? Put down that whine, eat a bite of humble pie, and consider how you can invite others to your party.
Pressure to Perform
The weight of carrying a project, organization, or passion alone will crush you. It turns even the most joyful tasks into drudgery. The Old Testament prophet Elijah knew this feeling well. He started to believe that the whole of God’s plan for Israel rested solely on his shoulders. This belief crumpled him into a whiney, self-absorbed, whimpering mess. He couldn’t take the pressure. What he didn’t realize was that God never expected him to be a one-man revolution. There were 7,000 others.
It is true that loneliness is real and can be a difficult thing to bear. Thankfully, God has raised up ministries like Propel for women in leadership, Embracing Grace for pastors wives, and Infusion, for women of every life stage to find community, encouragement, and support in their journeys. God never meant for us to serve Him alone. That is why He gave Eve to Adam, Barnabas to Paul, and “the fiercest pirates in the Spanish Main” to Captain Jack Sparrow. It might take a little searching, but He will lead you to your community if you ask Him to guide you.
Isolation
Trying to do it all yourself or choosing to take all the credit for a job well done will eventually lead you to the same destination: isolation. Independence is an American virtue—but only to a point. Refusing to appreciate or include those around you will drive them away. If you don’t want your feelings to result in a self-fulfilling prophecy, then it’s time to make some changes. Write some thank you notes. Make a few apologies. Ask for advice. Encourage others in their strengths. Share your dream and invite people along for the journey.
Seth Godin is a business mastermind and author of several books. He writes,
A tribe is a group of people connected to one another, connected to a leader, and connected to an idea…A group needs only two things to be a tribe: a shared interest and a way to communicate.
— Seth Godin (Tribes: We Need You to Lead Us)
The idea is not original to Godin. There is an African proverb that states,
If you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to go far, go together.
Going together takes intentionality. Without purposeful, planned inclusion, isolation will be your future. Click To Tweet
If you want to be a leader marked by passion and influence, you must find and flourish within a tribe. Begin by looking for others to add to your credit roll.
“A man that hath friends must whew himself friendly: and there is a friend that sticketh closer than a brother.” – Proverbs 18:24 KJV
To those of you that take the time to read and comment on these posts, I send a heart-felt thank you. It’s an honor I do not take lightly. If you are interested in supporting me financially as I write to be a blessing and lead through the ministry of Infusion, please visit my Patreon page to learn more.