Do you believe God? 

I’m not asking if you believe in God as I might ask if you believe in aliens or in Santa. But rather, do you believe that what He says is true? Do you believe that the promises of Scripture are meant for you? Do you believe that the talents He has gifted you with were meant to be a blessing to you and others? Do you believe that the dreams He has laid on your heart in the dark hours of the night will come to pass in time?

Much of my life I’ve studied God’s Word and accepted it as truth from an intellectual perspective. God says that His Word is truth and therefore it is. History and science also provide proofs to Scripture’s validity. I believed the Bible to be true on behalf of others who struggled with doubt or worried that God wouldn’t come through for them. I’ve prayed in faith that God would meet their needs. I’ve also prayed that God would meet my own and He has. I know Him to be faithful and true to His Word. 

But there is one dream I have that is so dear to my heart I’ve been afraid to fully give it to God. I’ve prayed around it. I’ve worried about it. I’ve hoped it might come true. But outright believing that God placed this dream in my heart and gifted me for it that I might pursue it for my joy and the benefit of others feels scary. Like perhaps He’s set me up for failure. It’s the dream of being a successful writer. 

I know that you can define “success” in many ways, one of them being to help another person with your words. Just one solitary person finding hope because of a blog post or book is a wonderful thing. So in that sense I can claim success today.

But if I’m honest, my heart wants more. I want to help hundreds, if not thousands, of people find freedom in Christ. I want my books to win awards for literary excellence. I want my name on the New York Times Bestseller List. 

All of that feels so out of reach that it would definitely be a “God thing” for it to happen. It also feels prideful to admit I have these desires. It feels like I’m not a good Christian because “good Christians” are to be humble and small and those who find success are sell-outs who have turned away from God to chase the success of the world. I don’t know exactly where those feelings came from. Perhaps I’ve internalized false messages. I can’t say for sure. 

What I do know is that God is leading me to take a new step in my faith—to trust Him and His goodness at a deeper level than I ever have before. The foundation of this step was laid last year as He laid the word “transformation” on my heart (read that post here) and then began to transform my mindset, body, habits, and more throughout the months of 2020. Last year felt preparatory—like I was standing at the edge of a cliff. This year feels like I’m stepping off.

I’m free falling. Some might call it going “all in.” Some might call it foolish or even sinful, but in my heart I know it’s right. I’ve decided to believe. 

Luke chapter 1 records two examples of people God chose to use in extraordinary ways. Zechariah was a priest. This is how Luke introduces him:

“In the days of Herod, king of Judea, there was a priest named Zechariah, of the division of Abijah. And he had a wife from the daughters of Aaron, and her name was Elizabeth. And they were both righteous before God, walking blamelessly in all the commandments and statutes of the Lord. But they had no child, because Elizabeth was barren, and both were advanced in years.” (Luke 1:5-7) 

As you can see, Luke enjoyed conjunctions as much or more than I do. *cheeky grin*

You might think of Zechariah as a sort of “preachers’ kid” today. He was born into the tribe of Levi, otherwise known as the priestly line. By nature of birth, he was raised to serve in the Temple in Jerusalem and fulfill certain duties. He was in the process of doing these when an angel came to him and told him he would become a father in his old age. He had all the Bible knowledge to know that what God said would happen. It was just a matter of time. 

But Zechariah, despite being a professional servant of God, looked at his circumstances and responded in doubt. They had prayed for years for a child and been disappointed. Now it was too late. They were too old. The timing was off. It wasn’t possible. Gabriel’s response? “…behold, you will be silent and unable to speak until the day that these things take place, because you did not believe my words, which will be fulfilled in their time.”

Doubt stole Zechariah’s voice. He couldn’t tell his wife the good news. He couldn’t share the blessing of Elizabeth’s growing tummy with the neighbors. He couldn’t sing for joy in the shower. He was silenced because of his unbelief. 

Several verses and six months later, the angel Gabriel made another visit to the Holy Land to share good news with a young woman named Mary. There would be another miraculous birth. Mary would bear the Messiah despite being a virgin and remaining in that state until after Jesus’ birth. It seemed impossible. Crazy even. She was poor, likely uneducated, certainly not a spiritual leader like Zechariah. 

Mary’s response was not to doubt, but to ask a clarifying question. The birds and bees talk didn’t cover immaculate conception. But once Gabriel shared the details she was “all in.” 

“Behold, I am the servant of the Lord; let it be to me according to your word.”

Mary knew people would misunderstand her situation. They would judge her apparent sin. They would heap accusations and shame on her head, on her fiancé, on her family. They would accuse Jesus of being an illegitimate bastard during His ministry. But despite the rejection, shame, and reproach she was about to endure, Mary believed God and put her faith into action by rushing to visit Elizabeth. 

Two promises of God. Two different responses. One doubted and lost the joy of entering into God’s plan to the fullest capacity. The other embraced God’s promise, acted in faith, and was blessed immeasurably for it.

For many years, I’ve lived like Zechariah—working for God as expected but gripped with doubts, fear, worry about what people thought of me—always waiting for the proverbial shoe to drop. This year, I’ve committed to acknowledge the fear, the unknown, the misunderstandings, the bad reviews, and all the rest, but putting my mustard-seed size faith to work anyway. I may never hit a best seller list, but I for sure won’t if I don’t work hard to make my novels the very best they can be. I may never reach 10,000 email subscribers, but it’s a guarantee that I won’t even reach one if I keep my words to myself and my blog posts unwritten.

God won’t bless a person who is unwilling to partner with Him. 

So for the next 11+ months of 2021 I have committed to believe that there will be a fulfillment of the dreams God has laid on my heart in His time. I will work towards making them come true and I will praise Him when they do. And at every turn I will thank Him for choosing me to take part in the work He is doing in the world. 

“Blessed is she who believed that there would be a fulfillment of what was spoken to her from the Lord.” – Luke 1:45

So what about you?

Have you made a commitment to believe God and pursue the dreams He has placed in your heart? Have you shared your dream with a trusted friend and prayer partner? If not, I’d love to dream with you. Feel free to message me and together we will believe that what God has promised will come to pass.