I had an interaction with a dear woman several weeks ago that has been on my mind ever since. She experienced abuse as a child at the hand of her father. Abuse that continued in various ways into her adulthood. As a result, she has some understandable doubts about the goodness of God. I won’t share the conversation verbatim. But the heart of her question was how she could trust that God loved her. How could she believe God wants the best for her when her circumstances point to the contrary.
I understand her doubt. I have felt her same desire to believe while hesitating for fear of being hurt again. Maybe you’ve been there too? I gave her several thoughts based on Scripture, but in hindsight, I wish I would have given her a different answer.
The reality is, we all have moments of doubt. We get a bad report from the doctor and we question why God didn’t protect us from this disease. We see the corruption and abuse in the world and wonder why God doesn’t wipe out all the evil. The funds dry up or the job goes away and become bitter because God hasn’t provided. A loved one dies and we can’t understand why God didn’t answer our prayers for healing.
Faith, and trust in the goodness of God especially, boils down to one thing. Choice. God has given us a multitude of reasons to trust Him. The ultimate proof of His love is Jesus Himself. Jesus chose to enter our world and sacrifice Himself to pay for our sin and unite us with the Father. If that were the only thing He ever did, it would be more than enough. But He didn’t stop there. He meets our needs, answers our prayers, speaks to us through His Word, performs miracles, and so much more.
Over and over again, God has shown us that He loves us and He is worthy of our trust. Yet so often, we point to our current trial or hold up our wounded hearts as proof God doesn’t love us and we can’t trust Him. We choose to believe a lie.
This pattern hasn’t changed since the Garden of Eden. God pours out His love and attention on His children and invites them to trust Him by obeying His commands. Satan twists the healthy boundary God established for our good. He makes us believe God is withholding something from us in malice. We ignore the proof of God’s goodness and believe the lie of Satan. We then use the negative consequences of our actions as further proof God is against us.
The truth is, God always gives us a choice. Always. He allows us to choose whether we believe He exists or not. We choose to believe He is good or not. Believe He is for us or against us. Believe His actions are for our ultimate good or destruction. God never chooses for us. He allows us to go our own way and learn from the natural consequences of our actions. God gives us the ability to choose because He wants a relationship with us. He created humans with minds, desires, and personalities because He delights in us. If He wanted to He could have created a planet of reproducible robots who always did what He wanted. But then that wouldn’t be love—that would be control.
So how can we trust God in the midst of hard times? How can we believe He loves us when He feels so far away? We choose to trust. We choose to believe that He is good and kind and loving. We choose to act on these truths even if our eyes tell us something different.
Think about Peter walking on water. The story is in Matthew 14 if you’d like to read it. Peter chose to get out of that boat and God granted him the ability to do the impossible. Why? Because Peter chose to believe Jesus when He said “Come.” The circumstances screamed danger. The laws of nature said it couldn’t be done. But God is bigger than storms and gravity. And as long as Peter kept His eyes on Jesus, he stayed above the waves. A flesh and blood human walked on the Sea of Galilee because of a choice to believe the Son of God.
I wonder how many times I could have done impossible things in Holy Spirit power? How many miracles have I failed to see or do because I believed a lie? How many blessings have I lost because I tried to operate in my own strength? How many answers to prayer have I ignored because the answer didn’t fit within what I thought was best?
What might change if I make a different choice in the future? What might change for you? Imagine what could happen if you decided God is good. That He is for you, and He is working all things together for your good and His glory. What bad habits could you break? What dreams could come true? Whose lives might change for the better?
Scripture tells us that Jesus did not do many miracles in His hometown because of their lack of faith. (Matthew 13:58) How many miracles is He not doing in your life and my life because of our unbelief?
I don’t know about you, but I’m growing weary of doing things on my own. I have reached the end of my rope. The things I want to see happen in my life depend on God doing the impossible. Which means I have to set aside my “try hard” habits and surrender to His will and way for me. I have to say, “God, I can’t but you can. Tell me to come to you on the water.” And then I have to get out of the boat.
What about you? Are you tired of trying to hang on in the storm and hoping you don’t drown? Do you want to see God hold you up on top of the waves?
I know we all wish we wouldn’t have any storms. That everything would be peaceful and beautiful all the time. A 24/7 tropical vacation minus hurricanes and bugs. Unfortunately, we live on a broken planet. Jesus even said, “In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” (John 16:33)
There will be hard times. We will face rough waters. But we can choose to walk with Jesus in the storm if we want to. We can choose to believe He will be with us every step of the way despite what the wind and waves tell us. And when we choose to believe, we show everyone around us how powerful and kind our Jesus is. We become living proof of God’s goodness and faithfulness. We become the lights of the world Jesus saved us to be. And what is more beautiful than a sea of stars shining brightly in the night sky?
The Day of the Lord is coming my friend. Jesus’ return is near. I can’t wait to see His beautiful face and hug His neck. Until then, I have to choose to step into the calling He’s placed on my life and be a light in the darkness. Will you join me?